Thursday, December 20, 2012

TO PASS GAS...OR NOT TO PASS GAS...THAT IS THE QUESTION

Okay, so Colin (2nd grade) and I have an interesting conversation last night in the van. I'm driving home from wrestling with the kids and Colin says, "Mom, I have a tummy ache almost every day in school." I said, "Why is that?" Colin says, "Because I have to hold in my toots all day long." I say, "Colin, there's no reason why you can't toot at school! It's definitely not worth a tummy ache if you hold in your toots all day." He says, "But I don't want anyone to hear it." I say, "Cough really hard and loud while you're sitting in your chair and toot at the same time." Colin says, "If I do that it will echo because of the chair." Then I say (trying very hard to hold in my laugh), "Okay, Colin, here's what you do. Go get a book or something and cough really loud. While you're coughing let your toot out then walk away. No one will hear you. If it's smelly you won't be the one to blame because you're not standing there anymore." He says, "Okay. I'll try." LOL Well, this evening Colin tells me that he had a tummy ache again at school. I said, "Colin, you're eating Fiber One bars for breakfast and that will make you gassy." Then Colin says, "I tooted during story time." I said, "Oh good. Did anyone hear you?" He says, "I don't think so...but it was kind of loud so I don't know why no one heard me." I said, "Did you giggle to yourself?" He said, "Yeah...I laughed to myself!" LOL I LOVE HAVING BOYS!!!!
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Thursday, December 13, 2012

Homework Help??

Colin had a Christmas Around the World project due today. We've had the assignment for 2 weeks and he's been reminding me regularly about it.  I just kept putting it off.  The country he picked was China. Well, Colin goes to work with Jim last night (West Side Connections...adults with disabilities class) and doesn't get home until 9:00. While I'm at home I google 'Christmas in China', then open a blank page on Microsoft Word, then retype the information and print out a few pictures. Plajorism (sp?) at it's best! LOL
 I'm doing kindergarten homework with Connor this morning and one of the sight words is TO. So, I put it in a sentence and say, "I am going TO the store." Connor says, "I am going number TWO" and of course he starts laughing. I said, "No, that's spelled t-w-o." Mason (home today with acid reflux...HAHA) says, "Connor, you could say I am going TO poop!" Connor was laughing so hard he couldn't complete his homework. I just threw the pencil in the air and walked away!! LOL

Saturday, December 1, 2012

THE BIG TOOT!


This one is for the books...seriously! Connor tells me this evening on the way to BJ's, "Mom, I got in twouble at schoow today because we we wew waffing." I said, "Connor, why were you laughing?" He says, "I wipped one on the cawpet and we all waffed!" Ryan pipes in, "How big was your toot?" Connor says, " It was weawwy big...and my fwends waffed and so did I!" I said, "Connor, that is awesome! Did you say excuse me?" He said, "No!" Ryan starts yelling at Connor at how big it was and is accusing him of his gas not being as loud as Connor claims. I was laughing so hard! (Okay, what the heck is wrong with me!??...LOL) The argument continued with me saying, "Ryan, why do you care? You weren't there and I believe that Connor's toot was really loud because I've heard them! He has man gas!" Ryan says, "Connor! What did it sound like!?" Honestly, I pretty much lost it from that point because it reminded me of a Honey Boo Boo episode...actually many...and I couldn't stop laughing! Regardless, Ryan was FURIOUS with Connor's claim that his gas was really loud! LOLOL

Sunday, November 4, 2012

Three Lovely Words!

I'VE HAD IT!  Those are the three lovely words that often chime through my head!  You know...I folded laundry downstairs yesterday while babysitting and I put all the folded clothes on the couch.  I didn't have a chance to bring the folded clothes upstairs because the two laundry baskets were filled with clothes that were waiting to be folded!  UGH!  Anyways, the kids get home from school and since it's Friday they immediately run downstairs to play video games.  Of course a 7 year old boy wouldn't think about the folded clothes on the couch so he just sat on them!  Eventually, all the boys came home and the folded clothes ended up on the floor...SCATTERED IN FRONT OF THE COUCH!  I just left them there for the time being because the thought of refolding them sent a gripping scream through my head!  Instead I prepare our Friday dinner...pizza!  I threw three pizzas in the oven and while they were cooking I started folding laundry in my bedroom so I could use the laundry basket.  Pizzas finished (clementines on each plate)...the kids devour the meal, except the clementines of course.  Jim and I get ready for an engagement party.  Since I have like NO clothes i go through Jenna's (11) drawers and find a shirt that would work.  We attend the engagement party and were only able to stay for half an hour because he had a WHS playoff  football game that evening.  We get home and the small ounce of hope I had of the mess being cleaned up by the kids was thrown out the window when I walked in the door.  Immediately I started cleaning the kitchen.  After cleaning the kitchen the kids and I went to Five Below to get Mason a cover for his IPOD and we were looking for a wig for Connor's costume...he is planning on being that little hillbilly Honey Boo Boo!  Haha!  I tell Connor that I'll go as Honey Boo Boo's mom and Connor (5) says, "You can't mom because you don't have enough fatness, but your but is big enough."  Thanks Connor  :/

We arrive at Five Below and discover they didn't have any wigs.  HOWEVER, they did have a nice assortment of whoopee cushions that my boys immediately started sitting on...lovely!  Mason gets his IPOD cover and Colin finds a safe for $5.  We hustle through checkout and leave the store.  Target here we come!

We go to Target looking for a wig in the Halloween section that was a serious mess!  Didn't find a wig...but as usual the boys found a lot of other nonsense to enjoy.  Amidst the chaos, Ryan loses his wallet and starts crying, which often turns to rage.  Ryan takes his wallet everywhere because he can't dare save his money.  We search among the costumes and nonsense on the floor for 10 minutes and I can seriously see the volcano erupting within Ryan's mind.  THANKFULLY, Jenna found the wallet!  Phew!  The kids are asking if I will buy them costumes and I tell them something a "normal" mother wouldn't say, "Listen guys, no one really cares who you are for Halloween!  It's dark out and it's all about getting candy!"  Still no wig for the Honey Boo Boo.  Sooooooo....

We head to Drug Mart.  They had a blonde wig for $10 and I was able to get it 1/2 off because it was on sale with the other Halloween costumes.  Cha ching!

The kids and I return home looking forward to watching the second half of the Westlake High School play off game.  Colin opens his safe and tries to put stuff in there and since it's a hunk of junk from Five Below the door to the safe doesn't close properly.  Colin puts his head on the table and starts crying. I tell him that we'll take it back and get another one. Eventually, I walk into my bedroom and see two baskets filled with clothes waiting to be folded and there are folded clothes all over my bed!!!  It's Friday night for Pete's sake and I'VE HAD IT with the laundry!!!  It's a constant vicious circle that never ends!  Colin and Connor start wrestling and running all over the house and eventually end up in my bedroom and they're wrestling on my bed of folded laundry!!!  NOOOOOO!

Then I tell them...."I'VE HAD IT....GEEEET OOOOUT!"


TTFN  :)

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

A Mother's Guilt

I realized this past week how much laundry and housework I do on a daily basis.  My youngest, Connor (5) asked me to play a game with him.  He said, "Mom, take a bweak from the waundry."  The first thing that went through my mind was....GOSH!  I can't take a break from the laundry or I'll get behind.  But then I thought, time is not taking a break from Connor.  Kids are only little once and I am so blessed that I can stay home with them.  Yes, I did take a "bweak" from the laundry and played a game with my son.  On the other hand, I can't allow myself to feel guilty when working around the home because doing my responsibilities around the house is loving my family  :)

Friday, October 5, 2012

Five Little Pumpkins

I was so excited yesterday! I finally put up my Autumn decorations. On my mantle I have Autumn color leaves (yes they're fake and from Michaels...haha) with some yellow/orange candles. Yesterday afternoon I took Connor and we picked up some pumpkins, hay and cornstalks for outside. I also bought 6 (representing the 6 kids) mini pumpkins and a few gourds for the mantle. Well, later in the day I hear a pounding.  I was in the basement doing laundry, of course. It sounded like someone was bouncing a basketball, which isn't surprising, even though the boys are not allowed to have balls in the living room.  I go upstairs and ask the 3 stooges (Colin, Ryan and Connor) what the pounding noise was.  Connor responds, "We wanted to see if the pumpkins were weal so we took one and we were hitting it on the fwoor!"  Then Colin and Connor immediately start to blame Ryan and Ryan says, "We were all smashing it, mom!"  Connor says, "You mashed it the hawdest, Wyan!"  I said, "Connor, YOU were with me when we bought the pumpkins!  How could you NOT know that they were real?!"  Needless to say, I now only have 5 little pumpkins sitting on the mantle...UGH!

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

UNSATISFYING LUNCHES! UGH!

Jenna (11) and Mason (9) get home from school this afternoon. They are barely through the door when Mason says, "Mom, did you put ranch dressing on my sandwich?" I said, "Yes." He says, "I don't like ranch dressing on my sandwich." I say, "alrighty then...did you at least eat it??" Then Jenna pipes in, "mom, did everyone get a cookie in their lunch today?" I said, "Yes, didn't you?
Then you can have a couple cookies!" I am SOOOO SORRY that I forgot to pack 2 REDUCED FAT OREO COOKIES for my daughter! I wonder if I forgot because of all the nonsense scattered across my counter???: loaf of bread, buns, lettuce, colby jack cheese, simply jif lunch buddies, 5 packages of presliced apples, 5 bags of chips, 5 icepacs, mayonnaise, ranch dressing, turkey, ham, salami, peanut butter, grape jam, butter, a box of wet ones, a package of napkins, ziploc snack baggies, 5 sandwich containers, a package of oreos, 3 gatorades, 1 water bottle, 2 juice boxes, 1 green pepper that I was slicing for (OH MY GOSH....Colin just came in and asked me if he can go #2 in the backyard because Mason and Connor are both going #2 in the bathrooms and he has to go reaaaaaaaly bad!!! NO!) back to story....okay, 1 green pepper for Colin and Ryan's snack, 2 rubbermaid snack containers, 5 lunch boxes....AND A PARTRIDGE IN A PEAR TREE!!!!